Today I hit my wall. I am burnt out. I am tired. I want to go home. I have been here for over a month and I am ready to call it quits. This feeling of exhaustion seems endless. I am emotionally, physically, and socially exhausted (if that’s even possible).
It has been an extremely hard transition from session one to session two. I think the hardest part is that I feel like I should have gone home when my session one team left, but the fact of the matter is that, I am here and I need to be just as open, just as honest, and just as excited about my session two team.
Don’t get my wrong my new team is amazing! Really amazing actually. I think I am having an inner-battle with myself. I think I am just physically tired of doing my job every day, mentally tired of dealing with all the pressure, and socially tired of trying to keep my patience in the kitchen.
I am struggling with keeping my patience, keeping my stress level down, and keeping the purpose of why I am here in mind.
TRUTH IS…I can’t do it alone. I am realizing that I am not going to make it through the rest of my assignment without Jesus right next to me. I am realizing that God is begging for me to rely on him, give him my struggles, and ask him to renew my strength. HE WANTS TO DO THOSE THINGS FOR ME.
“Have you not known? Have you not heard? The LORD is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He does not faint or grow weary; his understanding is unsearchable. He gives power to the faint, and to him who has no might he increases strength. Even youths shall faint and be weary,and young men shall fall exhausted; but they who wait for the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint.” Isaiah 40: 28-31
Right now I need help. I need prayers that I can confide in the Lord and ask him for strength. I have always had trouble asking for help, because I like to do everything on my own. I don’t know who I am trying to prove my strength too, but I need to learn that I NEED to rely on the Lord. God wants me, and is begging me to rely on him.
Tonight prayers for strength and that I rely on my amazing, all-powerful God, would be amazing.